Do Colleges Take Pie as Tuition Payment?

I have a dirty secret.

I've spent hours online looking at certain pictures. Scouring the internet, constantly searching for just the right one, just the one I want. Lusting after what I don't have, knowing that what's at home isn't satisfying me. I just don't feel fulfilled. I need something bigger. Something with more power. A little more oomph.

Something that will get my egg whites fluffier and my meat more tender.

I mean kitchen supplies, of course.

Specifically, I have two big kitchen mistresses. The Kitchenaid Artisan stand mixer in Majestic Yellow:

Image from amazon.com. Isn't she pretty?

And the 7 1/4 Quart Le Creuset French Oven, in Cherry Red:

Image from amazon.com. Can't you just smell the pot roast?

I want these things. I want them so much. It's too bad the combined cost of both is over $600 and my son would probably be mad if I bought fancy kitchenware instead of putting him through college. But son! Remember those really good birthday cakes? And those pulled pork sandwiches? That's why you can't go to Berkeley without crippling student loans. Totally worth it! Up top! And then in my fantasy world, we high five and he thanks me for being the best mom ever.

I feel bad for coveting such expensive items, especially considering that my own hand mixer, Sir Mix-A-Lot, has been so faithful to me. He tries his best, whirring at about the same speed, no matter what setting he's on. With only one attachment left, the standard egg beater, he does his best to whisk air into my meringue and keep my cake batter smooth, and I truly appreciate the effort. However, Sir Mix-A-Lot is not a work horse. He's getting old and it'll soon be time to go to the great mixing bowl in the sky. I know he needs rest, but I can't replace him now. Like an old factory owner, I'm going to work him until he dies or loses a part in an accident. (Oooo! An accident! Maybe I can convince the husband that Sir died in a horrible accident and THAT'S why I need a $300 mixer. How do you fake an appliance death? It was awful! The dip just exploded! There was cheese and mixer parts everywhere! I'll never look at avocados the same way again!)

Look at him. So tired and old. You can practically hear him complain about Social Security.

Neither the stand mixer or the Le Creuset are in my immediate future, because my practical brain tells me that while having a fancy mixer and french oven are nice, they won't help my son become a doctorlawyersurgeonengineer. So for now, I'll hide from Sir Mix-A-Lot, and stare at pictures on Amazon.com, all day long, watching the price go up and down $5, thinking, Maybe now. Now? I'll buy it now. No. Not now. Now. No. Maybe. No. I'll just go check Facebook.

Anything you covet, kitchen or otherwise, that's just a touch too expensive? Tell me what it is!